awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
I just had sex on a roof
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
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