ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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