Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize
