I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
two words: eviction party
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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