Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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