youre lurking in front of me
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
