mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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