what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
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