He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
