which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Randomize
