I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Randomize
