Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
