Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Randomize
