I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Randomize
