the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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