This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize
