after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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