Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
