You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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