maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
