It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
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