she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Randomize
