The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
