I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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