im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Randomize
