Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
There was a lot of him and a little penis
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
