Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
Randomize
