I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize
