Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
