I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
Randomize
