I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Randomize
