Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Randomize
