We should be called the Road Head Warriors
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize
