i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Randomize
