Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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