I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Are we still banned from the library?
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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