3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
