I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
Randomize
