She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
