people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
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