no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
She's the barista slut.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize
