Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Randomize
