I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
Randomize
