guys are not supposed to queef...right?
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
Randomize
