I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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