my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize