ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Randomize
