That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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