You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
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