doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Randomize
